SEA Results do not determine your child's worth

Your child is worthy.

Children's worth don't depend on what they do or achieve.

They are worthy because they were beautifully and wonderfully made by God and given to you to guide and protect.

However, as children go through school, they start to feel that their worth is based on external things such as their school grades or how well they perform in extra-curricular activities. And in many cases this is due to the many expectations, sometimes unrealistic, that adults impose on children.

The children who fail to meet such expectations then grow up to become insecure adults attaching their self-worth to their jobs or other worldly possessions. Then, said adults impose the same unrealistic expectations on their own children and the cycle continues. Vicious much?

So how and when does that vicious cycle end?

It ends when parents decide to become intentional about raising kids who are secure in themselves and who know that they are and will always be enough.

It ends when parents reassure their children that their grades at 11 years old are no real indication of how successful they will be in life.

It ends when parents help their children to understand that their intelligence is not based on their test results.

Where your child goes to school does not even matter if you are doing your full job as a parent. It is your job, not schools, not teachers, not peers, not celebrities, and certainly not the government to guide and support your child.

It is your duty to try to understand your child's unique intelligence and learning needs so that you can create opportunities that will bring out the absolute best in your child. And along the way, as you try to better understand your child, you will do the same for yourself.

So your child didn't do very well in exams? The only reason you may be disappointed is because you had too many expectations in the first place.

It may be difficult to not have expectations but we need to try as best as we can since unmet expectations are the root of disappointment and resentment between parent and child.

Here's some simple things that you can do if your child got a bad grade.

The easiest way to temper your feelings towards your child getting a bad grade is to acknowledge that years from now, neither you nor your child might remember this exam or grade. Instead, your child will remember how you made him feel and the lessons you taught him about dealing with failure.